When I was younger, I did a lot of thinking about how my life would turn out, or rather, how I wanted it to turn out. Nowadays, I live day by day constantly daydreaming and wishing that certain things would cross my path so that I could achieve certain things. Daydreaming and wishing had always been pointless to me and I’d label myself more of a “go-getter” than anything else but for some time I felt robotic as if just maybe I’d taken life too seriously. I possessed an imaginary mind but I hadn’t put it to much use when it came to my own life. That was a mistake because after a while, I felt like I shouldn’t have any dreams because they’d never come true anyway. I thought that having a serious and stable life plan was all that I needed to succeed. Boy, was I wrong…

It’s good to have a serious and stable life plan but one without any imagination can prove to be quite boring and can cause one to stray away from that plan if the boringness of it all completely takes over. That was what was happening to me. I’d allowed the boring parts of my life to dominate everything else and I found that dreams seemed far away and unreachable because my life just wasn’t that exciting. In 2009, there was a change. I’d started to go out more and see more things that I’d wanted. Although I’m still a simple woman, I’ve discovered that there are many other simple things that I desire as well.

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I’m sick yet again and this time I know how I got sick. One of my younger cousins came to visit this weekend and was sick but I didn’t know until her father (my uncle) told me after she’d went home. I knew I was going to be sick and it ended up being really bad and I had to go to the hospital for a severe asthma attack. It sucks because just when I think everything is going to be alright and I’m going to be better, I get sick again. For those of you who read my livejournal, you know the history of my health and why I’m always sick. I really just want a sick-free summer and to be happier all around. My mood has definitely changed a lot and I’m not nearly as moody as I used to be, that much I can say. This is just a small update letting you guys know what’s been going on with me. I will be back some other time to give a better update when I’m feeling better.

I’m not sure if I’m the only one this is happening to… but has anyone noticed the excessive amount of spam that wordpress has been getting? I was using two spam plugins but the comments were still getting by. Even though they are getting sent to spam, it’s still annoying to login and see these comments. I’ve just uploaded a new spam plugin and I guess I will see what happens.

I’ve recently started setting goals for myself and I feel really good about them. For some time I’d been in denial about having memory loss when it came to having things to do and doing things but I have to face the facts now; I am getting older and I have a lot of things on my mind everyday so I find it to be rather difficult remembering dates and such. A month ago, I bought a planner and just yesterday I began recording things into it. I feel better organized already. I know you’re probably thinking, “Why has she never used a planner before?” It is indeed 2009 but before last year, I’d never had a problem remember dates and keeping up with things but life has been so hectic that things slip my mind all of the time. Now that I’ve finally gotten out of the denial stage, maybe I won’t feel so forgetful.

I said I wasn’t going to work on my design site any time soon but I was thinking that it would be better if I just completed a little bit at a time. I have been doing mixtape covers, posters and flyers for friends and family so I figured why not put them on the site to showcase my work. I think it’s actually easier for me to complete these types of graphics because for some reason, I’m more imaginative. I’m a very simple person so sometimes I have trouble stepping out of the box and letting my imagination run wild. Even with the way that I dress, I tend to stay away from bright colors or any clothing that’s outrageous looking. Black, white, gray and navy blue are my friends when it comes to fashion. I don’t wear makeup, get my nails or hair done or get “dressy” too often. I like to keep things straight to the point and simple.

I’ve been feeling rather good lately and because of that, I’ve been more than inspired to take photos like I used to. I’m not a photographer but I like taking photos of myself and people. The photo in my sidebar was taken by me believe it or not. It’s not even a professional photo as people tend to think. I do think that I have an eye for photography though. I remember last year I actually considered being a photographer but that’s just an interest. It’s not my dream or passion. To be quite honest, I’m not too sure about my dream or passion anymore. I know it will all come together in time though.