I’ve never been one to have many friends simply because I feel that there isn’t a need to. A lot of people don’t know the meaning of friendship. For that specific reason, I tend to isolate myself from people a lot. I have had many friends in the past who have backstabbed me or really wasn’t being a friend when I needed one. So I began to cut people short. Honestly, to me, women can be some of the most conniving beings there are. They gossip & and backstab like no other. So therefore, when I do have friends, I hold them very close because I cherish the friendship and most of the times I’m grateful to have them as friends. Men can have other alternatives, so you have to pick your male friends wisely as well. For some people, having a lot of friends is a very good thing to them. To each it’s own. I personally feel like sometimes certain people can hold you back. Some “friends” are always looking for a shoulder to lean on, but when you need them, they’re never around to be there for you. That peeves the hell out of me. Over the years I’ve realized that I’m better off with a limited amount of friends. I keeps me out of trouble for the most part because we all know how persuasive friends can be sometimes. At times this messes up your rotation with things. You go out of your way to do things for people that you wouldn’t normally do and to me, sometimes, it’s a waste of time because I have my own problems to be dealing with. Those who are there for me %100 get the same treatment in return. On another note, what can anyone really say they know about some of the people they call their “friends”. Sometimes you spend years, thinking you know someone and it turns out that person is just as bad as your own enemies. I’m sure everyone knows how it feels to lose friends, especially over something truly unnecessary. Friends come and go, that’s why I’m very family oriented. Here is what friendship means to me:
What do you feel a true friend is? What qualities do they have to possess in order for you to label them as a friend?
shannon! dammit girl you were in my head! i was just thinking about posting an entry like this but i decided on something else.
this is real talk right here and i rem once upon a time i used to be everyone and they momma’s friend. not now to me less is better and i’ve been cutting people left and right for the bullshit. to me a true friend is there for the good, the bad, the ugly, and even when you don’t need them. they love you for who you are and are there to listen. i can go on and on but that is pretty much my basic reason. ok for the label question: caring, understanding, sexy lol, thoughtful, one of a kind, and always striving for the best. 
good post!
A true friend is a person that has your back from point A to point B. Someone that understands and accept who you are regardless of what you’ve done in your past or through life. There needs to be some type of balance in the friendship. One person can’t talk about themselves all day, that was my issue with my best friend. Even though I would ask her to come over because my I have a serious issue, this chic would come over and forget about me. She would talk about herself until she feels sit.
I need someone I can connect with. RESPECT is the key with me. If a friend can’t share something with me then we aren’t friends. We’re associates.
Enough! I can go on forever…lol.
I know how you feel on the whole friend subject.
True friends to me are ones who are honest, straight up “that don’t look to flattering on you” honest type of people. And help you pick something that does. A friend who will do everything to cheer you up when something is bothering you, not just saying “oh well” and go else where. Someone who always has your back. Will also call you on your crap, let you know when you mess up, but be there to help you get it together. That is what I believe a true friend is.
you already know now i feel about this subject. we both know from experience that people get the big head, switch up on you, and only want to be your friend when they need you. people tend to get so caught up in trying to impress people, that they take ona whole new persona and leave behind those who really care for them. a true friend is someone who can never really be mad at you, never switches up on you, and always tells you the truth even when you dont like it. one you can confide in, and know nothing you say will be told to another soul. you = that friend. i :heart: you.
i really do love this layout. i know you took your time on it, keep up the good work.
Me and you are alike in a lot of ways cause I feel almost 100% the same about friendships. When I was about 17, I had like 20 real close friends, i thought having more friends meant that I was like…special or something.
But now at the age of 23, I realize I was wrong. Right now I have about 5 close friends, one of which is my own sister. Poeple over the years drifted apart from me, maybe they went off to school, or had babys, or maybe we just saw our true colors in one another and didn’t like what we saw.
I now know that it doesnt matter how many friends you have, what matters is the bond you have with that person, and I think it’s perfectly fine to have even just 1 friend.
When i needed those people the most, that’s when they weren’t there, and that’s not right. But who was there when they needed me? That’s right Gina was.
I’m tired and annoyed of all the time I spent on fake ass people. Friendship is about give and take, and I think if more people realized that then so many friendships would not wither apart and fade.
A true friend is someone who’s honest, loyal, there for you, supportive, and loving. A true friend listens to you, offers you advice, and lends a shoulder for you to cry on.
I have one friend who qualifies under that, and he knows who he is.
a friend must be very trustworthy…and there are few ppl whom you could trust…
also, if you feel you don’t have to play a role–like be another person with them–then tthey are true friends. you dont’ have to impress anyone to like you, and these friends just like the real you!
Friendships. In no way am I good at them. I’ve never really had a big group of friends. Apart of me pushes those who try to be my friend away, and the other part of me has a problem trusting any ol’ body.
I thought I had a friend in one chick … but she stole from me, that sure isn’t a friend. We still chat on occasions, but I’ve never considered her a close/good friend. I don’t know how to trust “new” people, especially unfamiliar females. People often suspect that I’m just being shy when I don’t say more than two words to them … when really it’s more like “I don’t know you so I’m not really up for talking to you”.
I agree with most of your post, well written.
I agree with you completely on this matter. I don’t have many friends because it is hard to find people who are actually genuine and not just looking out for their own interest. I think true friends accept you for who you are and who you aren’t, and will help you through bumpy patches, or at least be there to hold your hand so you aren’t alone.
I don’t have a lot of friends due to the fact that people nowadays just don’t appeal to me anymore. The one’s I do have been in my life for years.
A friend to me is someone you can put all of your nurturing into and trusting them not to hurt you in return.
Wow, I was reading this and you sound just like I do. I’ve realized alot of this kind of thing the past couple of years ever since I got out of high school. It was then I realized who my true friends were, then a year after that, it turned out I was wrong, then I lost a few more friendships. But anyways I guess this isn’t really understandable but I just wanted to say I feel exactly how you do.
Hello
wow thats a pretty intresting blog you got here 
I know who my prober friends are && i keep my family close aswell so if anything happends i have someone to fall back on 
love the layout Peacee!x
I can’t tell if I’ve picked my friends carefully enough. I really can’t. I usually just go for the ones that I can have fun with and the ones that I can really trust. But there’s alot more then that.
There’s one in particular who I thought I could share everything with. But she spilled most of my secretive stuff and so now…everything is just really weird when I’m around her.
I don’t have ‘friends’ though whom I would actually consider family. idk…SIGH.
Friends. . . . I’m picky on who my friends are. I have alot of people that I talk to but that dont mean they are my friends. I’ve been stabbed in the back one to many times to completly trust someone from the get go. Unless you can show me that I can trust you and depend on you then you are not my friend. at least thats how I view it.
much love
i don’t have a lot of friends and frankly, i do not think i need a lot. it can be hard to sometime distinguish a true friend from someone who’s conniving. it can be tricky, ESPECIALLY with women. you’re completelyy right. i dont even know what to say to add to your blog.
When I think about someone who is a friend, I try to go beyond that of the general qualities that would typically make a good friend.
I like to make it more personal. I don’t like to use the word friend loosely because someone can easily know my name and not really have anything to do with me. I like to go even more personal and say that if that person hasn’t played an intergal role in my life to where they help make me BETTER then I can’t really see them as a friend. More like an associate or an acquaintance.
What I look for in a friend is someone who I can confide with and be able to help share, care and be there for each other and have each other back. And that feeling must be reciporcated. It’s that mutual feeling and understanding that makes the chemistry between the two work.
The challenge is, knowing how to INTERPRET who are your real friends are and those that are just throwing a facade at you. All this comes from maturity and experiences and all you can do is just learn from them and be selective at who you think are your real friends are.
Once you know who they are…..cherish them, love them and appreciate them.
Check out my recent blog about appreciation.
Take care hon. =)
I tend to watch who I make friends with because in the past I got extremely tired with people who wanted to steal from me, lie, backstab me and all that stuff that no one absolutely needs in a friend. So there fore I just dont care if I have a limited amount of friends, Least the limited amount I have doesnt screw me over like the plenty amount I had years ago. If that makes any sense, Hopefully it does. Hope you are doing good!
shananiginsss. its been so long woman! where have you been all my life? i love the new look, its beautimous as usual. yea, i have recently cut some friends off for some backstabbing bull ish. gotta watch for them bitches. lol. take care mama
Hi Shannon, I’m Ashley. I’m pretty new to the whole blogging/graphics world. ^^
I completely agree with everything you’ve said. A few years ago I was the girl with about twenty close friends… I realized that although I felt like I knew them all, and knew all of their secrets, I felt like I was babying them or taking care of them – and not one of them asked me how my weekend went in reply to my inquisitions. These one-sided, fair-weather friends were seriously bringing me down, and I’ve managed to cut my close friends list down to about three friends who I can trust with anything.
Guys are better when it comes to stuff like this. Although some of them are very immature, once you find a few good guy friends, they’e golden for life. They never backstab, and they’re always there for you. The hard part is finding the good ones to begin with.
Ah, well, what can you do?
My friends have to genuinely care about what I think and plan. My friends must respect my goals, and they have to be willing to build me up when I’m down in the dumps. But I don’t want someone to baby me, I want it to be a two-sided friendship that we can both work on and keep strong. It’s no fun if one person does all the work.
Thanks for the comments on my new layout, Im glad you like it, I think it’ll be up for a while. I find that in myself, I don’t like to have too many friends, starters its a lot to be up-to-date with, catching up with everyone and maintaining relationships is a struggle if you’re genuinely busy and such. But I think it’s important and healthy to have a small group of friends to revolve around. I find a true friend to be someone thats honest in every situation, genuinely cares for your well-being and enjoys your company, doing things and makes effort to socialise with you. Thats a friend.
jaz xxx
I tend to be like you – just a small group of friends. I’ve been hurt way too many times in my life to really care to keep up with a load of friends. To me, a friend is simply someone who won’t run away if you’re sad and someone who actually listens when you speak, not simply waiting for their own turn to talk.
I came to your site a couple times and read this post but didn’t comment, only because it was going to take me longer than what time I had to post.
I’m the same way, I limit my friends and I’m very careful about whom I call a friend. It’s rare to find someone that will be the same type of friend to you that you are to them, even though they think they are a good friend they suck.
I’m that person that will do about anything for anyone, help, ride, place to stay, listen to their sad stories time and time again…money here ya go, whatever. But when I need someone which is rare because I’m very private and keep everything to self. but when I do feel the need to talk where are they?
I really don’t have any friends, I have associates and buddies. I suppose my friend would be my cousin she is the only person that I’m REAL tight with. and I have one male cousin that I trust with everything too.
girl I could go on and on about this.
A true friend … someone that knows what they want from a friend and does what they would want someone to do in being their friend.
Thats my short thought of what a friend is, but not my only thoughts, it would take to long for me to detail it.
Sometimes having a close knit group of friends can be scarier because as you said, you tend to keep them very close to you. Therefore, even if they disappoint you just a little bit, it can hurt you more because you keep them on such a pedestal. Your best friend is really yourself and even though I’m blessed with great friends, I know that I should only trust myself 100%