We all enter friendships/relationships based on the assumption that we’re going to be accepted for who we are. Granted, there are those who enter wearing what we call “masks”, but we’ll touch on that a little later. Lately I’ve found myself questioning particular friendships in which, people expect me to be something I’m not. Most of my life I have been a tomboy, needless to say, I haven’t been what you would call girly all of the time. To some of my friends, this is acceptable and they actually look past it and see me for who I am. To some friends that I have cut off, they found this trait to be not so acceptable because of the standards society has set for women, I suppose. What a mistake.
Everyone’s idea of perfection differs, theoretically. I have my own perception of perfection because I understand that everyone is not perfect. We all have imperfections.
You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.
I try to stay true to that quote, because it’s quite true indeed. I have found that there are a lot of friends who I see in a perfect light. It’s not that they are the idea of perfection to society, but to me, they are. I see their flaws and I accept them, because that’s the way they are. I don’t ever try to put anyone down based of a trait that they possess, that I don’t. The mistake many people have made with me is thinking I’m supposed to be perfect. They paint a perfect picture of me that doesn’t exist. I’m a heathen, I use profanity, I listen to explicit music, I watch violent movies, I go against the “norm”, I’m not religious and I wake up everyday not knowing what’s going to happen and I’m okay with that. Why can’t people just accept others for the way they are? In my opinion, most personality traits are never right or wrong, just desirable or undesirable to individuals. If you can’t accept someone for who they are, don’t associate with them. Remove yourself from the friendship/relationship and stop complaining about it. If you walk around thinking that everyone is going to be just like you you’ll never learn a thing about life & people.
On a brighter note, those of you who will be attending the inauguration should be very careful while you’re there. I have a feeling some nonsense is going to happen, even if it’s minor. Things will be hectic out there. Goodbye Bush. :superhero:
I know what you mean by all of that. I’ve been a tom boy most of my life. Plain and simple. But that’s not why people hate me. To be honest, I’m not sure why I don’t have any friends. I am nice. I try my best to make people laugh and smile. People don’t even know my name and they already hate me.
Perfection is just an idea. It’s something that people thrive for, but it’s funny, because nobody in today’s world can define what perfection is. It’s just like beauty. You can’t define it. Who are we to choose who is beautiful or not? Perfect or not? It’s just an idea – something that people thrive for and it’s clearly destructive. All of it.
But yeah. Good entry. Really related to it well and you make very good, strong points.
This is why I keep my friendships limited. I don’t make friends with a lot of people. I’m not saying that everyone is a bad peerson but I would rather keep in touch with people I can trust. I have serious trust issues and I would be damned if anyone judged me.
I can’t stand that. Who gives anyone the right to judge another person? Friendships should be based on how much care and concern you have for one another. I do agree with your idea of perfection. There is no perfect person so stop looking.
I’m so excited about the Inaguration but I will be watching it from the TV.
You are speaking the truth!
Some people expect too much from other people to satisfy themselves. I feel sorry for them, but I know I will not allow them to bring me down in their selfishness.
Obama 08!
There’s this guy in my 4th period class that is different from everyone else. He’s more on the dark side and the things he say is a bit “weird”. The guys always laugh and pick on him, and instead of the other people in the class sticking up for him, they laugh right along because they don’t want to be outcasts. Well me on the otherhand, I curse them all out and I conversate with the guy on occasion because I know that no one is perfect and he shouldn’t be picked on like that.
i love that quote . all of my friends are SO different from me ,im such a girly girl. & most of the people who don’t know me think im a siddy bitch who wants to be white [ smh ] people are so crazy , but hey it makes the world go ’round.
That’s a wonderful quote. I think sometimes we focus so much on our differences that we don’t see the perfection inside each of us. It’s the differences that make us interesting. I’m a nontheist and every day it’s hard to know that there are people out there who would be happy if I just disappeared. D:
I’ve learned that people are going to think whatever they want. There isn’t really anything we can do about that unfortunately.
I think it’s nice of you to stick up for him. He’s going to remember that!
I know in HS there’s a lot of pressure to conform and anyone who is a bit different is seen as an outsider, but, really, there are adults that still act like that? I’m guess I’m lucky I haven’t come across anyone who expects me to be a certain way. I’m quirky, I’m silly, I’m geeky, but people in general seem to like those things about me. But I guess it depends on the people you’re around. In my office EVERYONE is different and everyone seems to love learning about eachother. Talk about diversity. All different races, cultures, ages, backgrounds, interests, hobbies.
And my social circle, well, they’re probably the wackiest people I’ve ever met.
So as far as a norm goes in the people around me, there is none.
Oddly, as much as people complain about hating high school and how much they hated feeling like an outcast, and then they reach adulthood, and realize that high school was the best preparation for it. But it’s definitely an eye-opener to realize that nothing really changes…or as the song by…ugh I can’t remember…says “High School Never Ends!”
I couldn’t agree with this blog more! I feel as though people expect me to be “perfect”, but I do all the wrong things, I’m not perfect what so ever, nothing about me is perfect. There’s only a handful of people (besides family) who really accepts me for who I am and genuinely cared to get to know who I am and let my personality build on them. Everyone these days it’s like, unless you’re “putting yourself out there”, they don’t want to give you the time of day and I’m not the type to just throw all myself out there, I take my time with people. I could go on forever about this, but basically me and you are on the exact same page on this subject.
OBAMA!!!
Wow I am so happy to be back in the blogging scene. Youre site is one of the first I went to because I remember I always enjoyed reading your blogs. An interesting one you posted, again.
I think that quote is absolutely true. I’m blessed with friends who will love me, even if I’m not perfect to society. We have fun and we can rely on each other because we know that we’re not perfect yet we accept one another. If we were to look for perfect people, we’d live a complicated and difficult life.
I think many people try to be “true” in front of people we love, but I think it’s not only about masks. Some people bring more truth out of us than others, some we feel can be more truthful than others due to various circumstances, for example, a friend who blubbers more than another, you will hold yourself back more than you do with your other friend who tends to listen more. It’s all a part of psychology as well.
TRUTH !
I accept people for who they are, because I know I have my flaws and traits that aren’t normal and i’m faaar from perfect just like the next person. I don’t call too many people my friends, and the ones I do I make sure they know the real me and accept that . If you feel like you can’t be yourself around someone, then you maybe shouldn’t be around them at all and thats what I live by .
love that quote , and I will say I would’ve never pictured you to be a heathen and use profanity lol but its cool .
That quote is so beautiful and so true.
As far as friends, I used to think that I had a lot but the older you get the more that you realize you have a lot of acquaintances and only a handful of true friends. You have to know the difference.
Wow, that quote goes on my list of a PERFECT one. It couldn’t be more true. It clearly states (indirectly), no one is perfect, but if we accept the things that makes someone imperfect, eventually it won’t matter. If you dwell on something you dislike about a person or prevents them from being ‘perfect’ then how far will a friend or relationship go? People need to understand that it’s not always the qualities that make a person, but how others deal with and accept them to. No one should march to the beat of someone else’s drum because of what someone’s idea of perfection is. We should all just be who we are, and if people did that, rather than being fake, mutual relationships would last longer and have more meaning behind them if you ask me.
your blog is so very true. i do agree and thanks for sharing the quote. very inspiring.
I totally agree with you. I find it hard to hang onto my friends because they all end up being really judgmental of myself and others. And I love that quote. Sometimes people ask me what I see in my boyfriend because he’s not the type I would ever go for, but I can’t imagine the way my life would have turned out had I judged him on the outside before really getting to know him. To me he’s perfect! :love:
I feel you. A lot of people I know expect me to have “perfect” moral values because I am a social worker. I am a bad little shit when I want to be. :evil